DEEP BREATH

This is one of my new favorite Christmas songs. I heard it on my way to work this morning and big crocodile tears welled up.

I admit. I was dreading the holiday season this year. Normally, Christmas is out of control at my house. An enormous tree, loads of decorations, bookoos of gifts WRAPPED AND ACCENTED WITH FEATHERS AND ORNAMENTS AND CANDY CANES. I just wasn't feeling it this year....until this weekend when all of the sudden the Christmas Spirit put its hands on my shoulders and said, "OPEN YOUR EYES. TAKE A LOOK AROUND!" And for the past few days, I have felt butterflies in my stomach and a lump in my throat. My God, how much I have to be thankful for. So there aren't stockings on my mantle, only a very simple nativity set. So there aren't 500 presents under the tree(in fact, my tree is quite crispy). So I haven't bought Betty every single thing her heart desires (so she can touch it for 5 seconds and forget about it).

Christmas should live inside of us, in our hearts. As I revel in this new found "Christmas feeling" I realize how much I've missed over the past years. If you slow down and take a moment to soak in all the simplicity Christmas can bear it becomes so much easier to truly feel Christmas within you. I have not spent hours stewing, shopping, wrapping, spending. There is no monstrosity of a snow village all over the house or a tree in every room. This Christmas, I will take communion at my church and be reminded that God dwells within you as you. I will gather with my family around a fire and enjoy a great meal. I will feel a sense of renewal as another year ends and a new begins. I will hold my darling little girl tight and watch the excitement flicker in her eyes. I will be warm and loved and happy and incredibly blessed. I will remember you have everything you need if you just believe.

If you just believe.