Saturday, July 18, 2009

ADAM

Two weeks ago today a man we loved and cared for was in an accident. And one week ago his soul went Home. The loss of Adam Joncay Crownover has rocked our community and tested my faith. I have watched my husband's heart break 1,000 times. I have never in all of our years seen him so broken, so lost and so sad. I still ask God 'Why?'. Why this man? Husband to Rebecca, brother to Justin, friend to many, and father to Acie.

Justin and Adam lived in the same neighborhood, were in the same grade, and played on the same football team. They ran the streets of Dumas and finally came home to raise their children. They are from the same mold, I believe. Hard on the outside but golden deep down where it truly matters. Tough attitudes and big hearts. Tellin' it like it is and unforgettable smiles.

I, however, was just getting to know Adam. He and his wife took us in when we moved here and somehow made this place bearable. Dinner, watching the girls play, road trippin' and more watching the girls play. I believed with every inch of my heart that he would come home. I believed we would be at yet another Demon football game this fall. I believed when the whole mess was over we would load the girls up and take them to the beach somewhere. I believed.

How do you go on when something like this happens? How do you remember to never forget? How do you release your anger? When do you quit wanting him back? The truth is, we all know, you don't. I believe that when someone you love dies a small part of your soul dies too. I believe Adam took a part of us with him.

This event has forever changed my life, my perspective and my faith.

At the closing of Adam's funeral, Rebecca stood in front of the church and said, " I will never truly understand why this happened, but I will not miss out on Christ's blessings because of it." And that is what I believe.